


Too Casual with Death

by Miss_Fallen



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Baddie of the month, Even if it seems like it sometimes, No death wish, Sarah Rogers is a saint, Seriously how did he survive in the 20s and 30s, She put up with so much, Steve has an interesting relationship with death, Steve's ailments, That's too many, boy - Freeform, put some back
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28719150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Fallen/pseuds/Miss_Fallen
Summary: Steve Rogers has an... interesting... relationship with death.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 14





	Too Casual with Death

The baddie of the month is pretty good, Steve had to admit. He knew their weaknesses and exploited them pretty well. Most of the others were incapacitated and Thor seemed ready to call for off-world help. Help Steve wouldn’t say no to if it came.

Tony’s suit is half-functional, Bruce didn’t come with them this time and Steve was thankful. Natasha and Clint were out cold and tied together to a post with some very high-grade wire. Thor and himself were the only two who could really put up a fight and they were on their last legs.

He heard groaning on the coms, sounding like the two assassins. Good, they’re waking up. Nat could get them untied and they could finish this if he could distract the guy long enough. A feat more easily accomplished with his shield, but not required. This is gonna hurt.

Thor is somehow down now and Steve has no idea how it happened. Clint and Nat are looking for openings that aren’t showing and Steve now has a very sharp spear pointed at his sternum. A fatal spot on most people, only slightly less so on himself. He’d take it.

“It looks like you lose, Captain. Your team isn’t so great after all.”

“I don’t remember saying we’re infallible.”

“Maybe so, it doesn’t matter in the end though. They’ll fall apart if I kill you.”

“That's your end goal? Kill Captain America?”

“One of them. Scared?”

Steve laughs and hears the disbelief in the coms from his teammates, “I’ve been telling death no since the day I was born and I’m not about to stop now. We’re old friends, you really think you can change that?”

The baddie looks confused. He probably isn’t used to people who laugh in death’s face.

“None of you ever expect people to not be afraid of death. Leaves you pretty off-balance.” Steve yanks the spear out of the baddie’s hands and puts it through his calf, pinning him where he is. Nat takes her shot and he’s unconscious.

“Good work guys. Let’s get him turned in and head to the tower.”

“Hold up Spangles, what the hell was that?” Tony squawks.

“What was what?”

Clint’s chiming in now, “The death thing. The fuck do you mean by that?”

Steve pauses for a minute, do they really not know? “Have you guys read my file? The literal laundry list of health issues I had before the serum? It’s a miracle I made it to 15 let alone my mid 20s when I got the serum. I nearly died every winter.”

There’s silence over the coms for a while before Tony breaks it.

“Oh.”

“Rogers, that’s not in the file we got. I don’t think there’s an existing file with that information.” Natasha says.

Now it’s Steve’s turn to be thrown for a loop. If Nat can’t find it maybe it doesn’t exist. He guesses it kinda makes sense, “That-That kind of makes sense. Peggy might have deleted all digital files of it in case anyone ever figured out how to turn me back. It’d be pretty easy to kill me in that body.”

Bruce chimes in on the coms, “So, laundry list?”

“Let’s see, uh, asthma, scoliosis, heart arrhythmia, high blood pressure, sinusitis, chronic colds, fevers, pneumonia, got scarlet and rheumatic fever as a young kid, body was pretty frail, some nervous system issues, colorblind, deaf in one ear, and my Ma had TB and diabetes so I was at risk for those too. I also got stomach ulcers, had pernicious anemia, and some other joint and bone issues. There might be more that I can’t remember.”

...

“What the fuck man?” Clint whispers, stupefied by the huge list.

“Like I said, I’ve been telling death no for a while now.”

“ _ Christ Cap _ .” Tony wheezes.

“Hey, you sound like I did when I had an asthma attack.”

“Really Rogers?”

“You’re much stronger than I previously thought, to have survived all of that with little medical attention.” Thor sounds impressed. 

“My ma was a nurse.”

“Yes, but that can only do so much of the person themselves does not have the strength to keep pushing.”

“Well, Ma always told me to always get back up and they all said I was as stubborn as they come.”

Bruce is still stammering over the coms, “Ye-yeah! Cap, all that cou-could still kill a person  _ today _ . And-and you survived it all in the  _ 30s _ during the-the  _ Great Depression _ !”

“So I’d survive it today no problem. Why are you all freaking out about this? It’s done and over with.”

Thor laughs while the others start sputtering again. Nat sighs, “You’re something else Rogers, you know that?”

“So everyone who’s ever met me has said.”

**Author's Note:**

> I had a lot of fun with this and then could not come up with a title for the life of me. So I asked my discord friends!
> 
> Me: Steve's too casual with death  
> Too Casual with death (the winner influenced by the titles below)
> 
> B: Steve and the Not Quite Normal acceptance of mortality  
> Bold of you to assume I fear death  
> Steve Rogers and his peculiar Laundry list  
> I laugh in the face of danger (Ha Ha Ha)  
> B also found Clint's reaction to Steve being so casual about everything pretty funny
> 
> T: Steve Ghosts Death: a love story  
> keep the dirt still in my grave, my heart it wanders here (Which I will be using for a different work being posted)
> 
> S: Cheating Death (She Wants to Break Up)  
> For Dawn and Death  
> Twice a Life Saver  
> I'm gonna try things here lemme  
> Every Last Breath (Cherished in my Lungs)
> 
> And no, I don't think Peggy would digitize documents of Steve's laundry list before the serum. They saw some shit in WW2 between Hydra and Howard. Peggy is a practical woman and you can't hack pen and paper.


End file.
